Aging gracefully

Wisdom doesn't automatically come with old age. Nothing does - except wrinkles. It's true, some wines improve with age. But only if the grapes were good in the first place.
― Abigail Van Buren

Every time I see an article or a talk show about how old people are not respected, are not treated good, how their off-springs are not performing their duties etc etc, I earnestly desire they see the other side as well. People, old or otherwise, have to be treated well, respected and cared for. Agreed. But why blame the young generation all the time without considering what they are/were being subjected to by the now old people.

I am not talking about ALL old people here but just trying to say that its very easy and common to take the side of a self-sympathizing, ailing, aging parent without considering the stance of the younger generation.

Today's senior citizens seem to want both the security of joint family and the luxury of nuclear family. They want the comforts that their children's money could buy but do not want to offer help with the struggles faced by the son/daughter and their spouse in balancing work and life and raising kids in a nuclear family. While I don't expect them to raise their grandchildren all by themselves, can't they be accommodating enough to oversee a cook or a servant or a baby caretaker?

They want to spend their retired lives peacefully with trips, tours and other leisurely activities but they do not realize that the youngsters too need some peace with all the struggle in today's fast paced life and the stress & pressure it brings along. While I don't expect them to cook, clean up and care for the home all the time, can't they be accommodating enough to give them a break once in a while?

Your children are neither an extension to your life to do things that you missed doing nor an accessory to be shown off proudly to your relatives and friends or to be compared with theirs. So what if a relative's daughter/son settled abroad and invited her/his parents to visit them on a vacation? While we don't expect them to leave behind a 'fat' will, can''t they be grateful enough for the life they lived and are living rather than whine and complain?

They dwell in the past, have the same rules or 'duty list' for their children and daughter in laws(especially) and fail to understand that the times are changing and so should the rules. While I don't expect them to treat their DILs like their own daughter, can't they be accommodating enough to not expect the DIL to take complete charge as soon as she enters home after a long day at work or in the weekends?

Aging gracefully doesn't just mean looking young at your 50s and 60s but its all about feeling young, lively, matured, accommodating and forgiving. Give, Offer and Love your children without expectations and they will follow your example.

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned.
- Judith Viorst

Do you see the point behind this post? Let me know your thoughts...